Girls Vac Day 2 (Last Day)

Yes I am lazy. I decided to not go get a DVD to watch and the same for to night. I think I am gonna read a bit. I am getting to the end of a series. Its getting quite interesting. Probably better than any dvd that's out there at the moment. So last night was quite. I think I go through a quite time when my Vacs are too short. I have to be ok when life returns to "Normal"

Ok I Admit

I changed some stuff on my Blog. Not quite Happy with it yet. Well I will have to see what else I could possibly do with it.

Girls Vac Day 1

Well its gonna be quite awhile before the next one. I think in August. Well unless something happens in the mean time. So I kinda have to make this one count. So I ran around got all the things I needed including Two Bottles Of Merlot Wine. So you probably think that I am an Alcoholic by now. I only drink on the weekends and if A girls Vac  takes place over weekdays. Other  than that I am as Sober as A Judge. Well not that Judges are always sober. lol. So I did the Mc Donald's thing which I have to say was as good as I remember it.

Goldfrapp - Rocket

Stopped

So I was put on a new Regime of Meds recently. The one a new one. The others were increased. The only thing I think the new one is causing Hassles. So I have decided to stop the new one and see if it makes a difference. If I am still feeling the same then it means it is the increase in the Old Meds if not then its the New One. Fun in the Sun As they would say.

Party List

So I got some Vodka, Tequila and Rum. Well the Tequila was fro the last Girls Vac. I'm gonna get some pizza's. You know the type where its already prepared and all you have to do is throw it in the Oven. Except I get the Four Cheese one and throw other stuff on myself. I did go to the Dvd Store but I wasn't really blown away by any of the Movies at the Moment. Maybe I will have another look tomorrow. We will see.

So

So I have a very small Girls Vac coming up. Which is cool. It gives me a little time to unwind. Not enough time to do my nails.But I really prefer the Long ones. this One I have at least stocked up for.

It Does Happen

yes I do gets to thinking every now and then. I suppose I having going through a Glut lately where I really Don't want to think. it really is because I had to do things that remind me of the ....... World we live. It was a few things I had to do so I was under Stress. I don't Know if you do this. Every now and then I questions things a bit. I have been thinking about this for awhile. There are two things the First is. If you have been chasing after something for too long. By the time you do acquire it. It has lost its Appeal. Now is it possible for someone that has been in The Closet for too Long. That by the Time they do come out. It's like Whatever. Woooop. big deal. Is it Possible for this to happen?
The Second is that if you've been in the Closet for too Long that by the Time you do Come Out. If You ever do. Then you are too Old to enjoy your new found freedom? is there an expiry date on being Sexy?

Every Now and Then

So every now and then I lose the Plot. Like lets say I get something I have been looking for. Now I am a Sucker for bargains. So I will the one Product at a Store. Then later I see a better product and More for Cheaper. So I buy it. Soon I have too much of this product and am not too sure what to do with it. So Invariably I end up giving it away. I hope to get better eventually. lol. I think its a bit late for that.

New

So I was given a new Med regime today. With most being upped and a new on added. Well let see how this works. Most of the time we really are just Guinea Pigs.

I Survived

Ok so I had some Spaghetti Bolognaise last night. Which I have to say my Tummy was not too Happy about. So I don't think I will be doing that too Often.

I Confess

So I am Vegetarian. Except I have been having these urges to get Mc Donalds. lol. So I am thinking of a Compromise. Well you must lead a Balanced Life. (Anything to Justify an Urge)

Ohh I never told you I have Two Rules for Life and I try follow them Religiously. Down to the Letter.

Rule No 1. Never take Yourself Seriously.

Rule No 2. There are No Rules.

So guess who is going to Win Out. Strike 1 For the Carnivores.lol

Aaaaaah

So anyway awhile ago I got this really Funky Purse. The thing I liked about is that it was bright but tastefully so. What I cant stand is there purses that look like thy belonged to My Dead Grandmother. You know those plain one colour almost like men's wallets. Or these really depressing faded flowers etc, etc.
So anyway I needed to get my card out of those card sections of the Purse and the whole thing came apart. I thought Come On I have only had this for a little while. So I went back to the store ans swapped it out for another Type. The thing is the coloring and the way it looks is no Comparison. Obviously the one that fell apart was badly made. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh.

Unfortunately

Unfortunately I was not able to see My therapist since The Therapist had an Emergency to attend to. Well  it might be awhile before I can go again. These things happen. We all have last minute emergency things that happen.

In Awhile

I will be seeing My Therapist shortly. Excuse me I'm trying to keep it together. I'm a bit Blaaah from the Party last Night. lol

So Another

So Another Girls Vac finished. The Girl is worse for the wear. Since I made up for the lack of a Party the first Night.

Girls Vac Day 2 (last day)

So I really didn't party so much last night. Which is Strange because Normally the First Night is hectic. Got a Dvd for tonight. One of those Girl gone Wrong movies. So I don't have to get up to morrow too early. So I can stay up a bit.

Girly Girl

So I had to go do the Documents thing. You know the Official thing. So I had two women sitting next to me. On either side. The woman on the left was Religious. I could tell by the book she was reading. The woman on my Right was a pretty Free Spirited Student. So I got chatting with her. Not long and we were getting on like a House on Fire. Doing the |Girly Girl thing. I could see a few raised eyebrows but who cares. So for tow hours I cam Out to a large Deal. Which was Liberating. Giggles.

Same Old Thing

It kinda is Soul destroying the repetitive nature of Life. Going through the Hum Drum over and over again. Just hoping that something will change. What we are supposed to do I don't know. Otherwise I wouldn't be expressing this. It does suck to be in The Closet. it does take a lot of Energy out of you. Consistently Lying, Hiding things that you do and have. Ok I am allowed to Gripe once in Awhile. If only I could win the Lotto. lol

Small Girls Vac Day 1

I am not really prepared for this vac and It is also way too small for me to get going. But none the less it will be Appreciated. Believe me.

Chocolate lol

Sensuality is not something that come from how you look. Its how you feel yourself (No not like that pay attention, lol). Anyway its the way you express yourself if you feel it within. I have seen Women that Ordinarily you wouldn't think were Sexy. But when you get near them they exude Sexuality and Sensuality. Its a way of celebrating yourself. It can not be taught its something you have to get in touch with yourself. Try something you haven't before something you wouldn't ordinarily think. |Yes now you can think those thoughts. If you think something is Slutty Like Hooke platform shoes. Buy a pair and prance around you home, apartment or where you live. Just be careful you could break your ankle if your not used to them. lol. But do something daring get to Feel Yourself.

Kylie Minogue - Chocolate

Sorry

I had a Binged yesterday. Ok all of this was not done in one sitting. Seven Croissants. Half a Sweet Chill and Garlic Baguette. amongst other things so this week I am going to have to punish myself at the Gym.Why we do this to ourselves I don't know.

I Think

I think that the Gym is starting to pay off but we are speaking about very marginal results. Still along way to where I will be satisfied. But is that not always the case.

For The Moment

For the Moment I am out of My Funk. For how long who knows. Unfortunately it has its cycles just as the Moon and other things we are aware of. You will hear me quite often mention that I am in some kind of Lull. It kinda comes with the Territory. The things that some T Girls have to do just to exist makes my Heart Ache. Society is a long way from accepting us on all levels. There might be or might not be rules and laws on the books. But ultimately that does not change the majority of Society. Come to think of it we are not much further that the Neanderthals were. lol.

Soon

So I have an appointment to go see my Therapist. Its amazing that we are only really starting to deal with the core issues now. Well we are only scratching the surface now. Therapy is an on going thing if your a T Girl especially if you want a letter to written at sometime. I use it as an Outlet since I cant really speak to anyone else Face to Face. Plus My Therapist and I do not have the History that I have with the rest of the People. What is more Important is that My Therapist is in My Corner. Irrespective of what I do or say there is no Judgement. Now how often can you say that of someone.

That I Did

So I was doing the normal things. Like going to the Mall etc. So I decide to stop in "Ye Local Friendly Music Store". Every now and then they have these Specials were you can buy lets say 2 or 3 cds for the price of one. Well I use this opportunity to get My Music. You will be surprised what you can get if your willing to take time to look. So I am listening to my cds at the moment which is really cool. No I am not going to tall you what I am listening to. lol.

It's a Shame

it really is a Shame that we can not be ourselves. I was Thinking and somewhere in Cyber Space I can hear some say "Don't Hurt Yourself". lol. So anyway we aren't really anybody unless we have other people around us. Think about if you were stuck on a desert island with nobody else there. It really would not matter who we were. But we wouldn't be able to share who we are with anybody else. So if you think about it being Stuck in The Closet is like being on an Island. because we cant share who we are with others. We have to be something we aren't. Now That is A real Shame.

Stressed

Just a bit. I need a vac. lol. Well I have a two day Vac coming up next week. Well I suppose its better than nothing. Right. Dealing with some people is just draining. Especially when you have to phone suppliers to get the thing that you bought to work. Well the first one I simply returned for. I was just not in the mood to deal with all The Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah. You know when dealing with support. They every reason under the sun. Except to be able to exaltation why it did not work as it should. You don't pay to have to figure out why the thing does not work. Well anyway I got another Brand and will never buy the first one again.

Stunning

I have to say that there are a few Drag Queens that are absolutely stunning. So to a large degree if I were ever to Come Out. I would like to look like some of them. I am not going to name names so that I don't reveal anything of myself.

Not Quite Yet

 I am not quite sold on the whole Wig thing. I really think it has more to do with up keep of the Wigs than anything else. I suppose I have never looked into how to look after a Wig. bear in mind the better the Wig the more expensive it becomes and we are talking about a lot of Money. That in of itself is obvious. What i mean by that is the more natural you want it to look the more expensive it becomes.

Absolut Comercial 2012

Not Easy

Nobody ever said it was going to be easy. Then again I have always wondered. If it was made so easy how many People would still want to Transition. You sometimes have something That is taboo or on the Outskirts of Society that has that Forbidden Fruit feel about it. If it were so everyday would it still hold that same Mystique. So would most move on to something else that has that Mystique about it. Something to Ponder. Well at least I think so.

So Yes

So it has been strange getting back into the routine of things. Its weird for I almost feel that something has changed. I am not too sure what it is yet. I just have a feeling that something is different. It will probably take awhile. I will figure it out.

How Bizarre

So I posted a post yesterday and just never got published. So today I'm looking at the Blog. Going where is ti. Anyway stranger things have Happened. So I reposted it.

Bubbling Up

Just every now and then the Stress of staying in the Closet will come out in strange ways. I suppose anybody that is suppressed for what ever reason will need to vent. Otherwise it will cause a problem. So some outlet to release your pent up emotions would be advisable. I certainly find myself quite pent up.

Step It Up

So I am trying to step up my beauty regime. Which really means just putting huge amounts of Cream on all the exposed parts of my Body. You kinda have to care of these things before you get too Old. I really want to try and look as good as I can as time passes. So I use a whole mix of Products. I know some People say you should use all the same brand of Products. Which I disagree with. For instance I use "Clinques" "even better" skin tone corrector. Which is a light weight Serum to lighten or remove blemishes sun  damage etc. If I use their normal face creams then it dries my skin out so badly that it starts to flake. Since it is so harsh I don't use them for that part. So that is one example.
More importantly just think of it as  in investing in your skin. If You treat it well now. Then later it wont let you down. Then you wont look like a "Crocodile Handbag". lol. For me it will probably be a "Snakeskin Handbag" lol.

Gonna

Well I decided I gonna have to get rid of those. I will keep them till Later G Strings when I have shed a few. I just don't think I will lose that much. Who are we kidding. I was really sorry to have to take my nail Polish off. Since even if I have to say myself they were done really well.

Yes I Admit

So I admit that I have been really lazy when it comes to my Blog. Whether I have been going through a Funk or not. At he end of this month I am seeing a different Doctor. So maybe they will change my Meds. Then we will see if it makes any difference. Well its really good that I have something to blame for being lazy. Lol. Yeah right. I suppose its a Girl prerogative to be lazy.
You know the more I think about it the more I think That a T Girl is different from the Normal Girl. I am yet to prove it. For the moment i just cant put my finger on it.

Normal

Well in one way |I need to return to normal. what I mean about that is I have to restore the blood in my Alcohol levels.lol. It was a little bit hectic. I have a very small Vac coming up in Two weeks. It might be the last one for awhile so far as I know. So the nails are back to normal. had to do a bit of tidying up. Hide all the Girls stuff and wash all the Panties. Sounds weird does it not.

Girls vac Day (Last Day)

Well Girls this is it. I was walking past the Mirror this Morning. I realize I gonna have to punish myself at Gym to try an gain some resemblance to what I had before the Vac. Not to say that there wasn't nay work to be done.
What I did notice when I was trying My new G Strings and looking in the Mirror to see how they fit all around. Now this is going to sound Weird but who cares here goes. From the Waist down I have one super sexy Bod. The Butt could do with a bit of work. Giggles. I am just not too sure what I am gonna to do with the waist up. it needs allot of work. lol

Girls Vac Day 5 (Second Last Day)

Well time flies when your having fun. At least that's what they say. Well I had some Croissants and Coffee these morning. Which I will spend the Next month trying to get it off at the Gym. So I washed my haul of Panties. Just waiting for them to Dry. Giggle. Once again I watched some Dvds last night and then read some of my Book. Just a very restful night besides the Wine etc. Giggle.
I think it really is about being able do the things that you want to in the way you want to. I will leave that up to each of you as to figure which makes you fell more like you. "My Secret Stash" is growing as time goes on. AT some stage after I got the other things. I am thinking of getting something Expensive Perfume. I have tried "Kenzo Jungle" which I like fortunately I have other things I need to get before I can get that. The way it works is by the time I wake up and want to get it it will be discontinued. Like I liked this One "Bvlgari" once again when I woke up its was gone. Well lets see what happens.

Bee Gees - Too Much Heaven (Video)

Girls Vac Day 4

I have to admit that I found that the longer the Vacs are the more normalized my situation becomes. Something like getting out of School. The first week you go Ballistic and then it slowly peters out after that and becomes normal. So I went back to the Red Wine. lol. Watched 2 Dvd's last night nothing to write home about. Got on the net and went to bed after that. So tonight is going to pretty much the same except I am making Pizza tonight. For the Girl loves her Pizza. Still so over the Moon about my latest haul of Panties gonna wash them tomorrow. Cool.