Disconnected

I have spoken about this before and will continue to speak about. Since as long as your in the Closet it never goes away. I don't think I ever got into Personas. Not to be confused with Personalities. Personas are ways of acting dependent on the company. So most of the time we are playing to different audiences since we can not be ourselves. There are occasions that we do leak out. This can be expressed in different ways. Hand Gestures. Referring to things you like or have a preference for. For example Pink lets say etc. The way you sit can be very much seen as being more Feminine. Etc etc. Now if you were to throw that and more into the mix then you would have an Effeminate Male to the Extreme. Not to be confused with Transvestites or Cross-dressers etc. (Nothing wrong with those type of Lifestyles) Just remember for us its a question of Gender and not Sexual Orientation. We are caught in a Given Gender assignment that does not fit. That is why one of the Physiological Diagnoses is known as GID. Gender Identity Disorder. The Sexuality is another issue to be addressed separately. for once you are to transform into a Woman. Then you pretty much have to decide who you are attracted to sexually speaking. (Sexual Orientation)
Well I digress since this was about feeling a Disconnection to what ever is happening around you. Its like Playing a Character to fool people which you are never allowed to slip. I think for most part the Longer your in the Closet then more difficult it comes to being able to separate the Personas. For they eventually blend together to become a united front. Well the last part is my own Opinion.
To put it simply we are bloody Lonely. lol. In the sense of we can never be ourselves and so therefore all our relations and relationships with others is based on a lie. Talk about a mind bender. For some of us we are pretty much doomed to spending the rest of our lives like this for what ever reason. The Reasons are all valid and can range from the One side of the Spectrum to the Other.
So in essence we often feel a sense of Disconnection as if we are looking in on our own lives from a point of being Detached.